word soup

Senior year in college i took a poetry class. Just because. The same reasoning led me to choosing philosophy, and wheel throwing ceramics, and black and white photography (the darkroom was like my secret lair that semester). Anyway. I took the poetry class not so much to learn the art of poetry composition, but to force myself to share writing with others. I would work so hard on the tiniest of poems. A stanza would linger on my page for hours. I wanted to make it good. Flawless even. I wanted to read it and feel it in every inch of my body, and then project that around me. I don't think i ever got there. I heard no sighs or quickening of pulses or sensed an eerie quiet during or after i read, but i learned to share. I learned to listen. I learned that anyone can write poetry if they choose. I learned that the simplest poem may create something of a syllabic symphony, leaving you feeling breathless. The only people that are truly bad at it are the pretentious, self-indulgent people that have no investment in themselves and nothing to reflect on paper. 2-dimensional poetry is empty and cold. It doesn't convey empty coldness in words, it just leaves the reader feeling a void...like they've just read nothing. It may as well have been a blank sheet of paper. What brought on today's reflection? Well, I mountain biked twice this weekend. I'm getting better, but I still feel like I'm spinning my wheels sometimes. Why didn't I make that climb? Why'd I cut that turn so wide? No matter how much practice is involved, there's always an unexpected stick or rock to throw you to the ground. Someday I may be skilled enough to avoid these. BUT, the anomalies in the wood make the ride an adrenaline rush. I accept that I might fall every time. And strangely (or maybe masochistically), I'm okay with it. I used to feel uncomfortable riding with people better than myself, like I was an anchor holding everyone down. Poetry is the same way to me. I used to feel inferior to people that were word minstrels, thinking i shouldn't bother showing them my tiresome verses. But it's different now. I'll ride with the experts and share with the poets. I'm not out to impress. Each time i try, I don't really know how it'll turn out...but the best poetry and riding result unexpectedly when I'm not trying at all - just flowing and the rhythm finds me...and it's ten times sweeter shared with someone.