habitually caffeinated

Begin Again

2009-02-06T13:11:00.002-05:00

Perhaps, this meandering blog needs dusted off and placed back on the shelf.

hoo boy

2007-10-16T07:34:00.001-04:00

Well, I'm averaging about a post every 2 months or so! yikes! Then again, I'm perpetually blathering on about my leetle 14 month ball of joy over at the peanut blog, so I suppose that makes me slightly less of a slacker.

I'm trying to gear up for NaNoWriMo in a few weeks. 2 years ago, roughly, Diane and I made a valiant attempt at jumping in and trying to finish National Novel Writing Month. HA! hahahahaha! Not as easy as I thought. However, I will not be deterred. This year my goal is simply to write all those words, not necessarily in a cohesive fashion, just write short stories and poems and random text until somehow I've managed to yank 50,000 words out of my noggin. It's going to be a giant pain in the ass, but hey...fun too! Yes, I'm a nerd.

Movin

2007-08-22T10:57:00.000-04:00

I'm in the midst of packing up all our belongings for the big 2-bedroom upgrade. We're t-minus 10 days from starting life in the new apartment. I'm beside myself with joy at the idea of having 2 bedrooms and 2 whole rooms of living space AND a dishwasher (*GASP*).

Other things:
*About to send in my Biomedical M.S. application. I'm just all about this grad school thing, huh? Hell Yes. There will be more learning.
*Peanut is growing like a water loving weed living in a tropical climate! (Or a draught loving weed living in the desert, whichever you prefer) And her tastes in food and life in general are ever evolving. It's amazing to watch. Every day I get this cool sensation of "wow, my life is good". In most ways my life is so very simple, but just so good. I guess all you really do need is love.

peace out :oP

Feel the burn

2007-07-08T10:26:00.000-04:00

I've been mountain biking every saturday. Prior to having Katelle, we used to ride almost every weekend, but at times there'd be lulls. A month of not riding here and there. No wonder my leg muscles never really stepped up to the challenge! For the past 2 months I've ridden every saturday (well, with the exception of one). And today I can feel the muscles in my calves. It's amazing that though life is chock full of so much more now, I'm riding consistently. It rocks. I'm one of those people that has pretty good ideas about what I want to do in life, but often lets those ideas slide by. I've wanted to be a better rider, but never really put the work in. Yesterday I climbed the same hill 3 times. Not a huge hill, but it was a hill that used to trip me up half way through. I'd put a foot down and take huge gulping breathes before continuing the climb. Yesterday, I owned that hill.

In other news. I'm reading The Fountainhead right now (Ayn Rand). It's been a long time since I've read anything in the realm of classic literature. Moby Dick may have been the last, and that must have been more than a year ago now. I've read plenty of good books, but reading The Fountainhead, I'm kicking myself for not reading more of the really good old stuff. Lately, I'd like to jump into each page and become part of that literary world for a moment or two. Everyone has different tastes, so I'm sure I'm exaggerating the weight of the book. But for me, it's a sort of holy grail. It reminds me of the times when I was a kid and would get so excited to run to the bookstore for the latest babysitters club book. Yes, it was the babysitters club. But I was so invested in those characters. I rarely get that excited about a book anymore. Or if I do, I have no problem forgetting that world a month later. I doubt I'll forget this one anytime soon.

Sunshine in my heart

2007-04-24T09:43:00.000-04:00

AND SUNSHINE IN THE SKY!!!!! Wow do I love sunshiny days. I love a cool breeze and the sensation of your skin gently warming under the rays of the sun. And of course the sweet swell of sunscreen emanating from my body preventing me from turning into an overripe tomato.

I'm ecstatic that spring is here. I used to think I was primarily a winter person. I love snow and hot cocoa and big warm sweaters and cuddling under mounds of blankets. I still love all those things, but lately I'm more in love with warm weather. The breezes, flowy skirts, flip flops, iced tea, picnics, farmers markets, walks outside. The idea of summer has me all wound up. The places I'll be able to take peanut! Maybe being a mom has transformed me into a more spring loving person. Maybe it's living closer to the coast. I'm not quite sure when the transition occurred. At any rate, it's a good day.

ps...the pens were ousted from the stanley cup playoffs in game 4 :o( Sad though I was, they're a young team with a world of talent among them. It was a FANTASTIC regular season, and a good learning experience in the playoffs. Ottawa really played their hearts out and earned the series win. The pens were gracious in their loss. What a great group of guys. I can't wait 'til next season. GO PENS!

Current Events

2007-04-12T08:36:00.000-04:00

Two things for this dreary cold April morning in New Haven (some form of ice/rain hybrid was falling from the sky this morning!!!). The first, Kurt Vonnegut Jr is no more. He died yesterday. In college, Diane wrote something clever in my bio at the end of our student literature publication. I can't recall it exactly, but Vonnegut and Trey Anastasio were mentioned. The 2 biggies from that time period in the life of Shannan. Farewell to one. How odd. The second thing for this morning would be that the Pens just lost game one of their playoff series to the Ottawa Senators last night. It was ugly. The Senators came out FIERCE. It looked like someone had stuck a few goldfish in a shark tank. BUT, I predict a comeback. This is a tough team with a tough coach. I think they needed game 1 to work through the nerves of being a young team and really get mad about what the Senators managed to throw at them. Yes. I predict some seriously gnarly penguin antics in game 2. We shall see.

the art of time suckage

2007-04-04T09:28:00.000-04:00

Some days, I feel like there's a little troll chasing me with a siphoning hose trying to steal a little time off the top. Before I know it, he's made off with a couple hours and some minutes of my time. DAMN TROLL! Isn't it fun to fabricate creatures and blame your lack of time management on them?? But seriously. Working full time and being a mom and trying to do all the little side things I used to accomplish with ease is tiring. I love it. I love it all with every breath in my body. But it definately feels like time passes by so quickly. It's gone before I even knew it was there. hrm.

woe is me

2007-03-21T13:07:00.000-04:00

My maintainance of this blog has been absolutely abysmal. The ever exciting land of child-rearing just won't let up long enough for me to peel my brain away and entertain the thought of posting something with a semblance of cohesion at this little old blog. Time to try again. Third try a charm maybe?

people-cicle

2007-01-26T08:17:00.000-05:00

It's 7 degrees outside, with a high of 19 expected for the day. Could someone pass me the hot chocolate? And a goose down comforter? Maybe draw me a hot bath with some nice smelling soap? Oh wait. What's this computer doing here? Oh. Right. Work. hrm.

A thought

2007-01-23T21:44:00.000-05:00

You know, most graduate schools require students to maintain atleast a B average in their courses. The consequence of falling below that criteria could be loss of funding or worse...getting kicked out of the program. Logical, right? If ya can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen. It makes you wonder how in a country such as ours it's possible to have such a terrible president. Couldn't we enact some form of "lose your funding" approach to the presidency. It doesn't have to be stringent, but maybe something like if you're approval rating stays consistently below 50%...your butt can be kicked out of office. Or atleast put him on some sort of probationary period. We ask alot of our academic sector, can't we ask just as much from our President?????

End of Rant. This whole state of the union always gets me riled up.

The plunge

2007-01-09T08:11:00.000-05:00

I've applied to graduate school. I am in a strange state of elation mixed with terror. Will I actually get accepted? Who knows. But damn, does life just keep getting more interesting.

hey you...stop evolving!!

2006-12-04T13:35:00.000-05:00

This article from the onion is just a big ball of humorous awesome.

10 years from now

2006-11-17T09:44:00.000-05:00

Ever run into yourself? You know, you're walking about doing whatever you usually do (like getting a coffee, which is what I happened to be doing) and you see someone that looks remarkably like an older version of yourself. Not so much in facial features, but clothing style, mannerisms, and overall presentation (sounds like I'm scoring an ice dancing routine). Welp, I just encountered a 10 years from now Shannan. She looked roughly late 30's, wearing a dark brown knee length cordouroy skirt with camel colored square toed shoes, bare legs, and a mid-length maroon tweed coat. She had a messenger bag slung over her shoulder and was ordering coffee!! heh. Anyway, I was amused. It was very character-in-a-sitcom-meets-future-self.

This morning I'm drinking a latte. Fully loaded. I've been drinking a cup of coffee every other day, and I savor every last drop. mmm. coffffeee!

high octane

2006-11-07T09:00:00.000-05:00

When I bought my Jeep the salesman told me to fill it with 87...premium schmemium he smirked. No need to go higher than regular. He said to fill it with 87 'til about 100,000 miles, then go up an octane after another 100,000, then after another 50 or so if I hear a knocking noise, go to 93...(He wanted to emphasize that this thing would last a looong time). Anywho, I'm now realizing that perhaps I too can run on 87. I just finished a cup of fully caffeinated java...and MAN DO I FEEL IT! woosh. I may as well have intravenously injected the juice of a dozen coffee beans into my veins, because that's what it feels like. It seems I no longer need 2-3 cups of morning java. wow. Never thought I'd see the day.

Daily happenings

2006-10-25T14:35:00.000-04:00

Since the birth of peanut I've been doing a lot of reading. Some new moms lament a lack of time for all things adult, especially reading...but I've found myself with an obscene amount of naptime and thus I read like a crazed fool! Actually it all started a few weeks before my due date. I think I had some subconscious fear I would never have time to read again, and so I started reading nonstop. I must have gone through a book a week or more, which I haven't done in a looong time. Then post-birth, Jake's mom brought me a bunch of Jodi Picoult books. So I've read four of those since the second week of September. I've read some science nerd stuff, some fiction, some travel writing (I love Bill Bryson). Now I'm about to read Isabel Allende's "House of the Spirits".
I have an addiction to book wish lists. I like to visit Powell's website (best book store ever, located in Portland Oregon...I've been there once and nearly started drooling uncontrollably at the vastness and scope of selection), and add new books on a regular basis. It's a sickness, much like my Netflix Queue. I have more than 100 movies in that damn queue, and I never stop adding. Last year we got 50 movies total from Netflix. This means I have 2 YEARS worth of movies chosen. Unnecessary much? But I digress. I was just thinking about how many books I've read recently and how we're traveling to Pittsburgh this weekend for a wedding, and Sunday will be my first mountain bike ride since April! And once again, pretty much basking in the glow of how mellow life can be when you don't think too hard and just do what's come naturally (and how much grandparents rule for babysitting this weekend)!

With any luck, I'll return to New Haven on Monday with bruises and muscle soreness. I haven't had a worthy mountain biking ride (including drops, rocks, and MUD) since February. Rock gardens here I come!

Balance and Flow

2006-10-12T11:41:00.000-04:00

Life has been one long string of things that I've worked hard at, but initially pursued to a minimum. College? I applied to 2 schools late in the year. Visited 2. Didn't like 1 but liked the other. Got Accepted. Went to School. The End. No complications. No in depth research. I pretty much just visited a school based on someone's suggestion and found it a nice enough place to continue my education. Post College? I applied to one job and took it. By chance it happens that I got the opportunity to study brain imaging, and work on publications, and present at conferences. Again, worked hard...but pretty much the opportunity found it's way to me rather than vice versa. Then came Yale. I presented data at a conference and was offered a job based on that presentation. So I went, and here I am. Then there's my little peanut. My fiance and I hadn't quite planned to have children for another couple of years, but were so happy when we discovered the news. Motherhood too, as it turns out, was unexpectedly dropped in my lap and has become my happiest time alive yet. And so now I'm faced with a crossroads. I have to apply to grad school. For the first time I'm researching and comparing and completely befuddled by the choices...and concerned that I won't get in...and won't know what to do next if I don't. Oy. But I have to trust that the flow I've become accustomed too will somehow find it's way into this process. I have to believe this happy balance will continue. If not, I'll adapt...but what a strange chapter in life I'm about to enter.

well then...

2006-08-24T14:16:00.000-04:00

Long time no blog. It seems this idea of imminent child-rearing has caused me to neglect my original lovely caffeinated blog. tsk tsk.
Lately, I'm a ball of continuous pregnant energy. I'm one of those happy-go-lucky, glow stricken preggos that many women may want to slap upside the head. I can't help it though. Nothing has ever felt so natural to me. Never have I felt more comfortable in my own skin. It's a bizarre and yet breathtaking feeling. And in 1-3 weeks, I'll have a new little person hanging around the apartment. And I may even get to drink an honest to goodness caffeinated beverage soon. Decaf beware. Your days are numbered.

SCORE!

2006-07-27T17:37:00.000-04:00

Not one, but two papers I co-authored were accepted for publication this month! I like windfalls of this sort. And, t-minus 1 month til I enter the land of momhood. who boy.

hrm

2006-06-30T15:07:00.000-04:00

I spent last week in Pittsburgh. The 'ol homeplace. It's funny, I love traveling home...but I love coming back to New Haven as well. I haven't decided whether I truly like living in this particular place or I just so enjoy having my own living space. I will say, however, that I've grown accustomed to the 5 minute drive to work, the daily harbor view, and the seagulls that usually swoop through the parking lot. There are days I feel as if I'm on my way to the beach, rather than work. I enjoy the smallness of New England. In one weekend, it's quite possible to travel through Vermont, New Hampshire, and Maine. I love that. If only I could import Pittsburghians here (and reduce connecticut real estate costs by about 50%). The best of both worlds.

craving of things biological

2006-06-05T16:17:00.000-04:00

I have a biology craving today. Straight up non-brain related biology. I had almost forgotten how simple some of that stuff is compared with brain stuff. I went online and started reading about glycolysis and all these associated things i learned in introductory bio freshman year of college. I almost think it would be kind of fun to teach it. I'd be that weird professor making strange references and inserting unfunny jokes into lectures. MUHAHAHAHAHA. How the hell do people go straight from school to a profession and then keep that profession for years?? I change my mind everyday! Well, not too much i guess. The ultimate goal is still to be a master of brains. Whether it be a "Master" of brains or a "Doctor" of brains doesn't so much matter to me. As long as there's a modicum of satisfaction and a gaggle of pleasant researchers involved.

where's the unexplained pig?

2006-06-01T17:07:00.000-04:00

I was perusing the net in search of music festivals earlier today and came across a band called "unexplained bacon". heh. I just had to laugh, and spread the laughter.

I can take my swimmies off

2006-05-17T14:00:00.000-04:00

So the rain has subsided (for now). I was beginning to believe my jeep would need to be traded in for a kayak. Though, we didn't get hit nearly as hard as those that were flooded in Massachussets, New Hampshire, Maine, and Rhode Island. And I must say, it's rather nice to see everything so lush. On my walk home yesterday aftenoon, I sauntered past a lilac bush and was hit so hard with the scent that I nearly fell over. I love how it smells after a good rain, but when the sun comes out, and flowers are in bloom...that smell is taken to a whole new level.

sobriety

2006-05-11T10:58:00.000-04:00

Neil Young has his new anti-war album "Living with the War" online for free: NEIL YOUNG
Listening to this kind of stuff always makes me sad and introspective, and pisses me off at the same time. When I think of smarmy old Bush in his fresh pressed suits with his legion of SUVs, I want to scream. But, instead I'll just pray for lives lost and lives in danger.

bizarre

2006-04-29T17:58:00.000-04:00

As I logged into my aol account the other day I noticed an article about pregnancy being "hip". Ugh. I couldn't bear to actually read the article, but the caption for it mentioned how all the current celebrity pregnancies are making becoming pregnant increasingly more hip. What? Yes, let me gain 20-30 pounds in 9 months, wake up at 4am to pee, have the uncontrollable urge to eat a whole container of hummus, and be a mushy gushy ball of sentimental goo. Sure, hip. That's the right word for it. All the cool kids are doing it, so it must be hip! Yet another reason reading celebrity oriented magazines and websites usually annoys me. They are packed with stupid. Don't get me wrong, I love this whole pregnant thing. It's quite amazing. Even my over-sized clothing is kinda cute. BUT, if one would use the word "hip" in defining the modern day preggo, I'd say the everywoman made pregnancy "hip" way before angelina jolie and brad pitt decided to spawn. I guess no one notices trends until famous people APPEAR to start them. what a shame.

good stuff

2006-04-19T10:53:00.000-04:00

So I'm reading all manner of mother blogs (did I mention I'M HAVING A BABY). Maybe I didn't. Welp, I am. It's surreal and fantastic and makes me warm and fuzzy inside. So, this morning I was reading a blog entitled "four sweetpeas". It's written by a mother with 2 children in Sacramento, California. Her and her family live in this beautiful place. Everytime I see families in places that are sunnny, mountainous, or on the ocean, I sigh and think "oooh, I'd like to raise a family there!!" But you know what I realized today? I was oooh-ing and ahhh-ing at this blog, but the parts that made me ooh the most were the cute anecdotes about grandma coming over to play with the kids, and the family Easter gathering, and even simple things like the new flowers blooming, and the new dress she made in sewing class (I'm guessing she's a stay at home mom). I'd love to live on the west coast, but it just doesn't seem to compare with what I'd get living in Pittsburgh. People trump atmosphere. Ah, it's nice to realize that :o) (though I still wouldn't mind about a 2 year sabbatical out there...maybe a post-doc position....pending of course that I actually get the "doc" part completed ;o)

flip-flop

2006-04-13T11:34:00.000-04:00

It seems the weather is finally cooperating. The sweaters are snugly under the bed, and the flip flops are getting dusted off and coming out to play. Once the farmers markets start opening up, I'll be one happy city living girl.

I watched Crash 2 nights ago. It was okay, nothing quite earth shattering. I expected more for all the hype it received, but it was okay. I liked the Constant Gardener better. The end.

Hump Day

2006-04-05T12:02:00.000-04:00

I have an iTunes playlist called "Hump Day Jammin'". It gets me motivated mid-week to crank out that data, and it goes something like this:

Front Porch - Umphrey's McGee
Lovely Day - The Boogie Hustlers
Rodeo Clowns - G. Love and Special Sauce
Upside Down - Jack Johnson
Mr. Charlie - Grateful Dead
Could You Be Loved - Bob Marley and the Wailers
Knot - Sunfire Pleasure
Eric->Step to the Street - Agents of Good Roots
Killing me Deep Inside - Slightly Stoopid
Renegades of Funk - Rage Against the Machine
Dancing with Myself - Billy Idol
Battle of Who Could Care Less - Ben Folds Five
This Ain't Livin - The Boogie Hustlers
Sugaree - Grateful Dead
Tough Livin' > Uncle John's Band - Guilty Pleasures
Jamming - Bob Marley and the Wailers
Stir It Up - Bob Marley and the Wailers
Burn to Shine - Ben Harper
My Apartment - Addison Groove Project

Happy Hump Day!

techno-geekery

2006-04-05T11:50:00.000-04:00

Well look at that:

Turning a decades-long rivalry on its head, Apple Computer introduced software today that it says will easily allow users to install Microsoft's Windows XP operating system on Apple's newest computers.

The software, Boot Camp, is available as a free download on Apple's Web site and will be part of the next version of Apple's operating system, Leopard. It works on Apple's three lines of computer that run on Intel chips — the Mac mini, the iMac and the MacBook Pro. - NY Times

just too funny

2006-04-04T11:55:00.000-04:00

Remember the FSM? The flying spaghetti monster? A clever retort to the theory of intelligent design? Well, I just discovered that there is now a book!!
It's The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster!! Holy Crap!

Get a load of this (from Amazon.com):
Behold the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM), today’s fastest growing carbohydrate-based religion. According to church founder Bobby Henderson, the universe and all life within it were created by a mystical and divine being: the Flying Spaghetti Monster. What drives the FSM’s devout followers, a.k.a. Pastafarians? Some say it’s the assuring touch from the FSM’s “noodly appendage.” Then there are those who love the worship service, which is conducted in pirate talk and attended by congregants in dashing buccaneer garb. Still others are drawn to the Church’s flimsy moral standards, religious holidays every Friday, or the fact that Pastafarian heaven is way cooler: Does your heaven have a Stripper Factory and a Beer Volcano? Intelligent Design has finally met its match–and it has nothing to do with apes or the Olive Garden of Eden.

How funny is that????

a disturbing trend

2006-03-29T10:51:00.000-05:00

I found something disturbing on myspace today. A young woman suffering from bulimia. And not just one, but many, many young women suffering from eating disorders and encouraging each other in their quest for what seems to be the only thing they know: to be thin. This is disturbing. This is even more disburbing than the appallingly large amount of pro-anorexia sites on the web. This is a young lady chronicling her downward spiral online. Her profile reads like a DSM IV diagnosis: "My Eating Disorders: Technically ednos*, but mostly bulimia...i remember the blissful days of anorexia though and I strive to get there again everyday; Pain Addictions: Hunger, slashing my stomach & ankles"
My heart sunk deeper and deeper as I read comments from other like-minded young ladies. Tales of their "successful" day of not eating a thing. Idle comments about "hunger headaches" that are normal daily occurrences. It's terrifying to me to see these candid stories, wondering where each will end up. Thinking, should I comment? Should I offer them research information? Should I do anything at all? Here's a young lady that is 5'5" with a goal weight of 90lbs. She mentions that she has started a new profile because her last one was "found out". I wonder, has she been to therapy? Do her parents know? Oh, I'm at a loss.

*[ednos: eating disorder not otherwise specified, this is when not all symptoms are met to fall into a specific category...for example, she may be binging/purging but combining that with periods of restricting her food intake]

ice cream, what's not to love?

2006-03-28T14:51:00.000-05:00

So it seems my reigning favorite ben and jerry's flavor(Karmel Sutra) has been replaced! What could possibly replace that caramel goodnes, you ask? A little ditty called Vermonty Python - Coffee liqueur ice cream with a chocolate cookie crumb swirl & fudge cows. yeah, uh, yum.

what the website says:
"We interrupt ourselves with much hooting through tin horns to bring you this brilliant new ice cream, made from dried shrubbery and old cereal packets. This is a ripping good flavor, really, so buy it quickly and run away, silly person, or we shall taunt you a second time".

I am devoid of clever banter today, and thus must drool over ice cream.

Stratton Moments

2006-03-21T10:28:00.000-05:00

Jake and I happily playing in some nice spots of powder.

2006-03-21T10:17:00.000-05:00

Chillin' at Stratton, checkin' out some slopestyle (you can see some of the course in the upper left).

ride ride ride

2006-03-20T09:25:00.000-05:00

This weekend was nothing less than fantastic. Three full days of snowboarding at Stratton Mountain, complete with three inches of fresh powder for our riding pleasure on Sunday morning. I haven't ridden powder since last year! We rented a rustic little 2 bedroom vermont condo for the weekend, with wooden ceiling beams and a wood-burning stove. It was so cozy to come back to that after each day of riding. After not riding for three months, I needed all the comfort I could get. This weekend was the US Open Snowboarding Championships. We hung out and watched the quarterpipe on friday, halfpipe on saturday, and slopestyle on sunday. Shaun White took home first in the halfpipe and slopestyle. We saw his halfpipe runs...DAMN, that kid can fly! We saw a few runs standing on top of the pipe, and then caught the action at the bottom so we could see the whole pipe. The pipe for this year exceded the Torino pipe by 4 feet, and was the largest in competition history...talk about going big! By Sunday, we were pretty tuckered out, but got to ride right next to the slopestyle course and catch come sem-final runs. By finals time we needed to get heading back to New Haven. I didn't realize until this morning that I missed Tara Dakides ride the slopestyle course. Bummer. She did a backflip with a melon grab. Woulda been sweet to see. Can't win 'em all. All in all, we caught a ton of competition action while still getting plenty of runs down the mountain. It was surreal to catch a patch of powder, then ride down next to a kicker and see a rider fly through the air, then ride down a little further a catch another rider hit a rail. oof. very nice. Next year we may bypass the US Open and opt for a weekend up at Killington. I'm told I HAVE to go there. Then again, the open is such a blast. What a great end to the winter season. I'm a little sad to put my board away, but running around in flip flops sounds better everyday.

silly boys

2006-03-15T10:51:00.000-05:00

We have a house guest this week. Jake's best buddy and partner in bike crime from the 'burgh. Actually, more than a week. It began last wednesday and goes all the way through this weekend (which will be capped off with our Stratton Mountain snowboarding extravaganza). I enjoy the heck out of house (er, apartment) guests. Last night I cooked up some pecan-encrusted Salmon, with mashed taters, and carmelized carrots. I'm so much better at cooking for three...with two, I always have a rediculous amount of leftovers. So the boys have been entertaining themselves quite well over the course of the past week. Examples:
1. Jazz is Dead at Toad's Place. I partook in this. The partaking was grand.
2. Saturday. 97 mile bike ride starting in New Haven, CT and ending in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. (I don't own a road bike *YET*, so I had to bow out of this little excursion)
3. Monday night. 9pm urban riding session through the streets of downtown New Haven. Stair jumping, wall jumping, and general overall debauchery. Where was I? Um, half asleep after eating a ginormous falafel. heh. Aren't I exciting?
4. This morning. 7am mountain bike ride. We have 25mph winds right now! yoi! (where was I? sleeping. come on now)

Can't wait to see what the weekend brings.

hot air

2006-03-13T16:49:00.000-05:00

This office is oppressively hot today. To the point that I've had a screaming headache and feeling of nausea all day despite an open window and constant hydration since 9am. If only this building were a bit closer to the Long Island Sound. I can see it from my window, just needs to be a little closer. Anyway. A rather uneventful Monday. The weekend was pretty mellow. I had a nice 2 mile or so walk around New Haven Saturday afternoon. Stopped in at a few gallery-esque shops, stopped by Ten Thousand Villages and bought my mom an adorable Easter trinket (a carved wooden egg). Coat open, sun shining...spring? Could it be? I'm already getting giddy for lily's, daffodils, and Easter eggs. And I'm definately ready for flip flops. (ironic that I'm going snowboarding this weekend!)

JAZZ IS DEAD

2006-03-10T10:45:00.000-05:00

Last night we ventured to Toad's Place for a night of "Jazz is Dead". I only caught wind of the band last year. I was listening to Jake's iPOD and suddenly I realize I'm listening to the Dead, only it's not the Dead. I's a jazzy, funky, devoid of vocals rendition of the dead. It's the dead, and at the same time, it's something totally new and fantastic. It's Jazz is Dead, and it's like a musical revelation. A random snippet from Jambase:

This is not just another Dead “tribute band.” Far from it. The band’s approach is to take the great repertoire of the Grateful Dead and to interpret it in a jazz-fusion style. There are no vocals; this band is all about focusing on the amazing music without allowing the vocals to distract from the “musical conversation,” as they call it. They are trying to give a fresh reading to material that has aged well but that has nonetheless been heard largely one way for decades.

The musician lineup isn't constant, but one thing that remains is the deep musical talent of each musician that steps up to take part in this dynamic collaboration.
The line-up for last night consisted of:
-Jeff Pevar (Crosby, Stills & Nash/Phil & Friends)
-T Lavitz (Dixie Dregs/Widespread Panic)
-Jeff Sipe (Phil & Friends/Aquarium Rescue Unit)
-Dave Livolsi (John Scofield Band/Tower of Power)
-Rod Morganstein (Dixie Dregs)

Two Drummers (Sipe and Morganstein)! And let me tell you, I'm no expert, but Sipe is something of a marvel. I love shows where the drummer (or drummers) are showcased and get to go off on insane tangents. At the end you're left with a mouth hanging down to the floor and an expression of "holy F**K!!!!". Songwise, we were treated with rockin' versions of Tennessee Jed and Scarlet Begonias...and for the encore it was DARK STAR! I was so tired by the end of the night, but it was well worth sticking it out to hear that.

And so. JAZZ IS DEAD. Check 'em out. If you have the slightest interest in the Dead or Jazz, they won't disappoint.

A literary moment

2006-03-08T12:48:00.000-05:00

In high school we read "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" by T.S. Eliot. There were days and days spent on this particular Eliot piece. Not a stanza passed without a thorough dissection and discussion. On day one, we loved Prufrock. By day 900 (okay, i'm exaggerating a bit) we wanted to personally hunt down J. Alfred Prufrock and flog him mercilessly into literary submission. He was quite the nuisance, to the point that I'd find myself wandering the halls sing-songing these lines out loud:
"In the room the women come and go
Talking of Michelangelo."
JAP was like a giant mosquito wriggling about on the flypaper of our brains. urgh. But in retrospect, all that tireless analysis served a purpose. I actually remember the damn thing. It made an impression. I learned. And remembering this long proves I didn't kill all my brain cells in college after all. College. This brings me to today and why Prufrock is making this special blog appearance. I came across this: The Closest Jay Comes to a Love Song. It's J. Alfred Prufrock...adapted for frat boys. It's a damn entertaining spoof, if only because of my long history with JAP.

Here's a little taste of the original:

LET us go then, you and I,
When the evening is spread out against the sky
Like a patient etherised upon a table;
Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets,
The muttering retreats 5
Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels
And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells:
Streets that follow like a tedious argument
Of insidious intent
To lead you to an overwhelming question … 10
Oh, do not ask, “What is it?”
Let us go and make our visit.

In the room the women come and go
Talking of Michelangelo.

And an excerpt from ode de frat boy:

Let’s go babe, you and I,
When the night’s straddling the sky
Like a passed-out drunk guy.
Let’s walk down frat row.
Yeah, let’s go
And remember our night in the HiHo Motel
And that wack restaurant with bad oysters. Hell!
Frat row that flows like a stream of spilt beer
When the keg is empty
To point us to the question…
But don’t ask “Where’s the other keg?”
I’d rather sit here and fondle your leg.

At the rager the chicks come and go
Talking about art or something, I don’t know.

I am so completely amused right now, it's downright scary.

Eureka

2006-03-07T11:08:00.000-05:00

I'm cured. Oh happy day. (with the exception of some minor residual stuffiness...but nothing this girl can't handle :o)

textured eating

2006-03-03T12:45:00.000-05:00

I'm still surfing the wave of illness. The flu is relentless. I don't recommend it. I'm one of those stubborn workaholics that usually makes it to work regardless of feeling like a giant pile of crap...but not this week. I had to concede. The flu beat me. Not only that, it beat me for an entire week! That is so utterly disappointing. I need to give my immune system a pep talk. One of the most annoying aspects of flu-ness is that I am faced with a complete lack of sense in the smell and taste departments. Case in Point: Yesterday I made myself a bagel with peanut butter and jelly. The PB was slightly melted from the hot bagel (just how I like it), and the jelly sat nicely on top. It looked so fabulously tasty, but eating it was like sucking down warm thick slime on a sheet of cushy styrofoam. blech. My Edy's Fruit popsicles taste like ice cube sticks, ben and jerrys ice cream all tastes the same regardless of what flavor I try (last night I had some form of peanut butter chocolate with nuts...atleast that's what Jake told me I was eating). All liquids are the same, with the exception of carbonated ones. Ginger Ale atleast has that cool fizzy thing going for it. So I'm resigned to textured eating. "Ohhh, this tastes like crunchiness!" and "This tastes like smooth!" I should just go buy a bunch of pop rocks.

the dread pirate couch potato

2006-02-28T17:01:00.000-05:00

That's me. Not by choice, mind you. I have the sickness. What sickness? Whatever has been going around, and I mean going around. I've talked to people in differenct time zones that either also have the sickness or are just getting over the sickness. This sickness comes in many forms. Jake had it just before me. He started with the tired feeling, and then was an immobile piece of almost human glued to the couch for about 3 days. Coughing, runny nose, fatigue. Those are the hallmarks of the so-called "sickness". My mom had a slightly different form. Mainly she had the tired part, and it kept her away from work for only a day. However, she's tough as nails and able to combat sickness in a way most people can't. MY SICKNESS takes the cake. I came home friday afternoon to make a tuna melt for the recovering Jake, and I couldn't make it back to work...the tired crept in like a tip-toeing thief. In snuck in as I was tuna-melt making and set up camp. By saturday, I was a non-moving sloth. I really couldn't move. Moving resulted in the contents of my stomach making it's way into the toilet bowl. I thought toast was my one allie. Nope. The toast also met the toilet. For three days I may as well have just made myself a plate of toast and dumped it directly into the toilet, it would have cut out the middle-man. The bright-side? I've been vertical for more than 2 hours today! I can type complete sentences without making whiny sounds and having to stop and retreat to the couch. I'm in a state of recovery! And OH, it's a magnificent feeling. I conquered 4 entire slices of toast! WITH BUTTER! AND CINNAMON! Take that stomach! Anyways. Tomorrow it's back to work. It's been an annoying 4 days, but darn-it if I'm not ready to get back to work.
Beware the sickness! Drink your tea! Take your vitamins! Go buy garlic pills (I used to take these, but i stopped...and I think I was actually a wee bit healtier with that extra does of garlic)! Have a fruit smoothie!
-ramblings of a recovering ralph-aholic

2006-02-20T13:51:00.000-05:00

Ode to decaffeination, from my friend too much coffee man. tee hee.

ode to bein old skool

2006-02-15T14:18:00.000-05:00

So, the Valentine evening began with arrival of sweetest boyfriend in the world bringing tired and mellowest girl in the world a lovely rose and a giant burrito (you might be amazed, but a burrito is a direct route to this girls heart). I requested said burrito, but only after having been offered my very own boyfriend chef for the evening. I opted to let him off easy. Plus, less cooking time means more cuddle time. ah, the joy and simplicity. After laughing at some American Idol Idiocy (amazingly, last night was the first instance in which I watched American Idol for more than 15 minutes, and was even slightly amused), we walked up to Toad's Place for the Umphrey's Mcgee Show. Now, there was a time when I was such a young lass wandering around at these shows. I'd dance and beer drink and wander about in such a daze. I'm not so much different now, as more observant and sentimental and sponge-like. I like to take things in and experience them (the younger days were more focused on being whimsical and happy and not caring about your capacity to remember things after that 6th, 7th, or 8th beer). So there I am, and it struck me. I am freakin' old school! I'm in a room with a mean age of probably 22-25ish. I'm just outside the cusp, but i'm out there. I'm a vintage wine in this crowd. When did this happen?
Every concert is different. The last five or so I've been too had more of an older crowd, or atleast a mixture (Reverend Horton Heat, Les Claypool, MMW). I've definatly been to concerts where I was of the older element, but those were concerts where I knew this ahead of time. This one wasn't really an obscenely young crowd, but I could tell I was old hat. And it was odd because it's one of those bands I have in my arsenol, one that I'd see repeatedly. Never thought I'd see the day that would happen. Regardless, good music and good times. We met a gaggle of fellows there (quite drunk by the time we found them), and had a damn good time. And even saw some seerrrriously old skool cats that probably bested us by 20+ years hangin about. heh. It's kind of fun to be the old-heads. It makes me feel wise 0ld owl-ish. And you're only as old as you feel, right?

Americans know how to get it done in the pipe...

2006-02-14T15:02:00.000-05:00

Teter and Bleiler after going 1-2 in the women's halfpipe yesterday. WOOP!

bliizzzard!

2006-02-13T10:05:00.000-05:00

We finally had a blizzard. A heck of a Nor'easter swept through and coated the area with about a foot of snow (give or take a few inches) between saturday night and sunday afternoon. I suited up in some long johns and snowboard pants and had a damn good time shoveling up a storm yesterday afternoon. whew. And this morning was absolutely beautiful! The skies are clear and blue, snow still coats the streets, and I'm trudging around in my hiking boots all day long! That's the way I like it. As much as I'd like to blow off work and go snowboarding today, I'm not. I figure I have one month until we'll be spending an entire weekend shreddin' it up at Stratton...so I'll bide my time and just smile at the snow.

I spent a nice chunk of time watching the Olympics last night. Shaun White took the men's halfpipe gold. Didn't see that happening or anything. duh. He won every single qualifying event going into the Olympics, and hasn't lost yet this season! My bets on him to win the US Open Halfpipe this year (he sat out last year due to an injury during practice)...and I'll be there to see it! (the Stratton trip) woo! In other news, Ohno fell in his semi-final lap and didn't medal in the 1500m short track, and Bode Miller came in 4th in the men's downhill. A little disappointment there, but ah well.

Time to dig into Monday's to do list. Work Ahoy!

sigh

2006-02-07T14:51:00.000-05:00

I feel like the city of Pittsburgh can heave a giant sigh of relief. For 26 years we have been building this massive super bowl win expectation, and it has finally come to pass. Yes, it's exciting. But mainly, it's gratifying in the most relaxing way. Pittsburgh deserves it. Pittsburgh shines so bright when it's victorious. One for the thumb. mmm.
In true Steeler fan fashion, we couldn't sit idly by on the couch and watch the super bowl by ourselves. We drove over to the Poconos (about 2.5 hours away) and settled in for a drunken super bowl party, complete with borrowed Roethlisberger jerseys (mine resembled a dress more than a jersey, and I traipsed around in it like a little kid with a new toy), chicken wings, and pierogies. Mmm, pierogies. So now I'm back to work, and periodically checking KDKA for updates on the parade. My final day of Steelers mania, then it's time to get back to work. It's been such a nice trip.

An Inconvenient Truth

2006-02-02T16:58:00.000-05:00

That's the name of Al Gore's documentary about global warming that premiered last week at the Sundance Film Festival. I have more respect for Al Gore every day.

things n'at

2006-02-02T15:59:00.000-05:00

word of the day, via merriam-webster:
cathexis • \kuh-THEK-sis : investment of mental or emotional energy in a person, object, or idea

Back in the day I used to get the word-of-the-day e-mail. It got annoying though, just one more daily e-mail. So now I just look 'em up when I get the hankering to learn a new word. Anywho, I took stock of my bazillion updates and realized I'm nuts. My e-mail updates include but are not limited to:

Nature (science journal)
Nature genetics
grist.org (environmental)
snake river wild salmon
relix
toad's place (concert venue in new haven)
phish update
drug policy update
MoveOn.org
washinton post
netflix
urban outfitters
victoria's secret
back country store
cingular
bank of america
providian
green mountain coffee
birkenstock
J.Crew
overstock.com
borders
skimail (breckenridge, vail, beaver creek snow updates)
stratton mountain update
washington post
friendster (yes, i have a stupid profile on stupid friendster. gah!)

so, these are usually spread out over a months time, but no wonder my Inbox is always so flippin full! I think I'm gonna go cancel all the store ones now. They're a result of ordering things many moons ago and accidentally clicking the box for e-mail updates. And they're completely unnecessary. Too much clutter. The story of my life.

SOTU

2006-02-01T13:22:00.000-05:00

Bush is a nimrod. He was a nimrod before he spoke even one word last night, and he will continue to be one until the end of time. I didn't pay much attention after about the first 10 minutes, but I had to peruse the morning assessment of his speech. The man never says anything new. I wonder what he does in his stupid little oval office all day. I imagine he has an X-box hidden in there somewhere. Either that, or he spends his time practicing those ever so eloquent language skills with his collection of Hooked on Phonics. I miss the days I atleast respected the president. If I saw Bush on the street, I'd be searching for the nearest produce stand selling tomotoes. Yup, someday I'll end up in jail for a run-by tomato-ing.

fun with STICK-E's

2006-01-31T10:20:00.000-05:00

My bike got quite the overhaul for Christmas: disc brakes, new wheel set, and a new set of tires...a set of Kenda STICK-E's. Now, I was already fairly impressed with the STICK-E, but then this weekend happened. We started out into the woods around noon on Sunday, 6 of us total. The forecast called for rain at about 3pm, so we figured we had plenty of time to play around before the weather hit. The rain beat us though. We got a nice downpour toward the end of the ride. My wool top layer kept me pretty toasty, but that sucker got soaked pretty good by the end of the ride. Anyway, back to the STICK-E. In the rain, normally I'd be skidding out on every other wet leaf and rock, but not with the glorious STICK-E. I was riding down rocks like nothing. OH, the joy of traction in the rain. I was impressed. I was confident. It was thrilling. And, we topped it off by dragging our sopping wet, dirty selves into the local Irish Pub to grab some food. Ham and Cheese never tasted soooo good! Now, the hope is that the weather will turn a bit to the cold side so I can take next Monday off and explore some New England snowboarding. There are atleast three places I know of that have $15 lift tickets on Monday! woo! It's so worth a day off, since your garden variety lift ticket usually runs more than $50. Once you get up to Stratton and Mt. Snow, it's closer to $70. Yeah, not real cost efficient. Super Bowl Sunday, followed by a day in the snow! What could be better?

anticipation

2006-01-26T11:42:00.000-05:00

Wow, I have to wait a WHOLE 'NOTHER WEEK to watch the Super Bowl? I've been keeping myself entertained up here in the northeast with the HERE WE GO Steelers Song. I know if I were in Pittsburgh I'd be driving through neighborhoods plastered in black and gold, so I gotta give it up for the Steelers atleast once a day. WOO!

In weather news (oh, yes, i'm more fun than a barrel of monkies today), the forecasters made a big to do about a "Big Chill" last night. They seriously went on and on about bundling up for the next few days because it will be reallly cold out there. Meanwhile back at the farm, it's in the 30's, and gonna go up to 40 this weekend. What the heck are those guys smoking? Comedian Lewis Black does a bit about the weather that suggests perhaps just using monkies as weathermen. Give them some darts to throw, add up the numbers...there's your temperature. Atleast then we couldn't really be irritated if the weather forecast was bologna, cuz heh....the weatherman would be a frickin monkey!

decaffeination

2006-01-23T17:04:00.000-05:00

I had my first starbucks decaf latte...and it was good. It was so good I almost didn't miss the caffeine (I missed it only when i realized I was just as tired before as after I drank the beverage, and had no problems falling asleep even after having a late night coffee drink). So the decaf challenge meanders forward. habitually de-caffeinated? hrm. hrm. More like habitually on hiatus. yep.

HERE WE GO....

2006-01-23T10:09:00.000-05:00

What's this? For the first time in 10 years I can actually sing the line "Pittsburgh's going to the Super Bowl..." and it's true????? Unbelievable. It figures I had to move to New England for the Steelers to make it to the big dance, but oh how sweet it is. You know what's the absolute icing on the cake? I'm watching the Seahawks/Carolina game last night, and there's a legion of fans waving Terrible Towels! In Seattle! Talk about your dedicated fans. Talk about your kickass football team. HERE WE GO!

just one calorie, not caffeinated enough

2006-01-18T13:01:00.000-05:00

So i'm surfing the non-caffeinated wave. I'm surviving solely on sleep, strategically placed caloric intake, and my exhuberant personality (HA!). It's quite the experiment. I'm learning to appreciate the merits of decaf tea and hot chocolate. I can't bring myself to drink decaf coffee. It makes me feel like a heroin addict trying to kick the habit with methadone...like I HAVE to have it or I'll twitch and scream and work myself into a junkie's frenzy. Granted, I love the taste and smell of coffee sans caffeine...but before I hop on the decaf train I figured I'd give coffee-less-ness a go. Again, it's quite the experiment.

In other news tidbits:

Jan. 7, 2006 - William "Doc" Mctaggart died. DOC! The most rediculous yet intelligent english professor I'd ever spent time with in a Westminster College classroom. Goofy, off-the-wall, unique, side-splitting, intelligent, insightful, somber...these words all mashed together almost come close to capturing a small part of DOC. He was a campus legend.

Bound Words: I've finished 2 books since Christmas (I got about 8 new ones). Stiff, and Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister. STIFF was good (the life and times of cadavers in research), but so many people lauded it as being masterful...that I found it just okay. I think it's mainly because I'm a biologist. I like to study life. I like mystery and discovering systems and reading about the human brain. Reading about cadavers was just okay. She made some funny comments, but I didn't find them overly clever. Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister was totally worth it. I read it in about 2 days. It's light-hearted and sparks memories of reading/watching Cinderalla as a child. I love adult fairy tales. They're easy, and fanciful, and give a bit of realism to their childhood counterparts. It's comforting to have a glimpse into well-known characters.

canada, eh

2006-01-10T14:34:00.000-05:00

I have Canada on the brain. A new canadian is about to be born...any time now, up on Prince Edward Island. Friends having babies. It warms the heart. So Canadians. Sidney Crosby is one. He's not having a baby or anything, but damn that kid is inspiration on skates. A delightful reporter is covering the ins and outs of Sidney's rookie season for the The Globe. In a weekly series entitled "The Rookie" she keeps us (and all of Canada) up to speed on the interworkings of the hottest young rookie in the national hockey league (and ever??).
Even better, she has a blog. A Sidney Blog! It's more personal and humorous than the column...and it's a good waiting for baby announcement diversion.

welcome 2006

2006-01-03T11:22:00.000-05:00

another year. speechlessness ensues. I feel change coming on. I'm not sure why. I guess i'm feeling motivated again, and when i actually feel a wave of motivation creeping up it leads to good things. Sometimes anyways. I feel like i'm getting better at saving money and paying things off (even though i still feel broke all the time), and I'm getting excited to go to grad school again. I hit a pseudo lull about mid-year and was seriously considering just getting some high-falootin pharmaceutical job making lots of moola. Moola would be nice, but i like university life. Vacations and colleagues and only as much pressure as you want to put on yourself (most of the time anyways). I have to say moving to New Haven was probably the best decision of 2005. I learned to live away from my family and friends, but not too far. I learned living away isn't so bad, and it makes visiting the 'ol "hometown" a lot of fun. I learned that trying out new places is a good thing, and that gives me so much more confidence in applying to schools in places like Oregon and Washington State. I'd really like to go someplace that would help build Jake's career, and not just mine...and going someplace that is crazy outdoorsy is the best way to do that (he could instruct, or take outdoor courses, or scope out a bike shop location). It's hard to find the best program for me, but the best location for both of us...but i'm gonna try really hard.
I got to see all my friends over vacation, and that was the best. I didn't get to see them for long amounts of time, but just seeing them was refreshing. I'm like a rechargeable battery. 2006, here I come.

Not so fast Mr. Stevens

2005-12-21T14:03:00.000-05:00

The Senate blocked the Defense bill! Drilling backers fell four votes short of blocking a filibuster. So hopefully, the drilling language will be removed and they can proceed. Somehow I doubt it will be quite that easy.

The talented Mr. Stevens

2005-12-20T15:01:00.000-05:00

Ted Stevens, you crazy Alaskan Republican! You are the worst kind of politicican! I oppose drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, but even those who don't should be appalled at your actions!!

Mr. Stevens included a last minute statement allowing drilling in ANWR at the end of a Defense Appropriations Bill voted on Monday. The Result? The House passed it and now it goes to the Senate. Many politicians against drilling in ANWR voted for the Bill due to the nefarious plot concocted by Mr. Stevens (the bill also includes aid for victims of Hurricane Katrina and support for the troops in Iraq, making it more difficult to vote against). Thus, Republicans will certainly yell from the rooftops about Democrats being anti-Katrina once the inevitable filibustering starts. Oh the joy of political turmoil.

The Scoop.

it's beginning to feel a lot like...

2005-12-18T12:28:00.000-05:00

Christmas. Yes, no clever twists there...just a homage to the season. I'm getting excited. Only a few days until Pittsburgh! I've never had that "home for the holidays" feeling before. Not in the way it will be this year, coming from afar. The anticipation is starting to bubble inside me. At the end of the week we'll be loading the jeep with presents and driving 8 hours to arrive at the homestead late Christmas Eve. We'll get there with just enough time to have a cookie snack, place presents under the tree, collapse into an air mattress of tired, and wake up a few hours later to Christmas music, a blazing fire, and the smell of fresh muffins and coffee. Ah, yes. Family, Friends, Dinners, Gatherings, Snowboarding, beer guzzling, coffee drinking, cookie eating...the joys of home.

Random Holiday cheer: We found ourselves at a party last night. It was comfortable and in a small apartment filled with many people. I discovered that Magic Hat #9 (an apricot flavored beer) is much tastier from a keg. The nicest part was that everyone was asked to bring a toy or canned good to the party. These are the things I love most about the holidays. People and giving (and especially giving to people).

random shuffle

2005-12-15T11:01:00.000-05:00

I'm like an itunes setting today. My brains on party shuffle. Here's an assortment of the thought bubbles floating around my head at present:

1. Who is the person responsible for phish playing on the weather channel? Years ago there was a thread on phishnet about hearing a tune on the weather channel. What excitement! That was back in the day when phish was just gaining popularity. And now, phish is still there. It warms my heart, and I wonder who is behind this wonderful weather channel phish? (last night it was "it's ice" ...oh the cleverness)

2. The Dukes of Hazzard Movie. Why o why??? Jessica Simpson has about 5 lines, and she sounds more rediculous with every single one (and HELLO, daisy was a brunette!). The original dukes were smooth...the movie just makes them look dopey. I know it's a spoof, but geeez! I like fun stupid movies, but this one just seemed lame. Except for the general lee (oscar worthy performance no doubt), and the character sheeves...he was the funniest part.

3. why is my computer so slow? my brains are in slow motion (the ones on my screen, not the one in my head. Though sometimes i wonder...)

4. coffee. coffee. cooooofffffeeeeeeee!

a happy ending, with a touch of optimism

2005-12-14T11:09:00.000-05:00

So karma did hear me. My extraordinarily nice landlord drove to New Haven (recently and temporarily relocated to Providence, RI) to fix our heating issue. I arrived home to a warm and cozy apartment. I chesire cat smiled all the way to the couch.

So I decided to peruse the blogger.com blog picks today, and I picked a good day to do so, for I found thesplinteredmind.blogspot.com. This is the blog of an overwhelming optimistic man with a neurological disorder. I haven't gone much further than reading today's entry and his first entry, but I am completely appreciative and in awe. Tackling obstacles in the face of any type of mental or physical malady always gets me, in a good way.

karma, can you hear me?

2005-12-13T17:03:00.000-05:00

Seriously. Can you? What did I do?? I wonder this as I sit in my office at 5:00pm, dreading the return to my unheated apartment as the temperature continues to drop, and drop. As I start to think that maybe I'll just pretend I'm recreating a portion of the arctic circle in the hopes of intimately learning the habitat of the penguin. Maybe I could channel the life energy of the penguin. I could dress in black and white, try to slide down things on my belly, and pretend I'm warm in my little layer of bird skin.
In all seriouuussness, I have no heat. It inexplicably turned off last night. And of course, today was the coldest day so far this winter. The nerve of my heating system!! My landlords are thus far MIA, so beginning this evening we're heating with electric. I'm gonna be walking around dressed like an eskimo for atleast a couple hours until the heater really kicks in and gets to heating. The temperature was on it's way to around 50 degrees in my homeplace as I headed out the door a few hours ago (I stopped home for lunch). Ah well, tea and blankets. I can't really complain about being forced to use either of those two. hrm.

more holiday cheer

2005-12-11T10:23:00.000-05:00

Another great holiday website: secretsanta.org
This one lets you search for local toy drives. I found 11 within 10 miles of New Haven! You can find links for all types of organizations here, including local toys for tots events, food banks, and womens shelters.

And THIS WEBSITE is just for fun. There's a Christmas game section! It has Christmas tetris!!

Spreading Holiday Cheer

2005-12-10T23:37:00.000-05:00

So I just spent about an hour cruising the net looking for area giving trees and other places to donate gifts. I'm sure any local church would have a place to donate Christmas gifts, but I found this great website. I bought a 4 year old boy a 4x4 truck. aww. Check it out...

Would you like to help brighten the holidays for an underprivileged child this year? Then visit www.MyTwoFrontTeeth.org, the only charity that lets the kids actually choose their own gift!
You can browse through the gallery of wishes, read about the children, see their hand-drawn pictures, and then purchase their toy online. The entire process takes only five minutes and costs less than $25!
Stop by http://www.mytwofrontteeth.org today, and help fulfill a child's holiday wish!

the cult of functionality

2005-12-09T07:54:00.000-05:00

I'm still afflicted with morning disease. But it's snowing! I was up at 6am. I looked out the window and saw an untouched blanket of snow, and large flakes flying past the street lights to the ground. I got to ride through fresh snow in my jeep. First Tracks! Even though it wasn't on a snowboard, I'll take it!
So as I'm walking toward the PET Center in the snow (about 2 blocks from my parking spot), I'm ecstatic about wearing gore-tex on my feet and having the ability to lazily drag my feet in the snow and even kick around in it, if I so choose. The best part is being able to take your time, instead of doing the rapid walking, continuously shaking your feet off, shuffle. I don't understand high-heeled women in the snow. I'm sure I've done it many times, and I know I've done it when I only had a short distance to walk...but I still cringe. If they're wearing dress boots, atleast that's something...but heeled dress shoes in the snow? And we're not talking half slush/half snow or a light dusting. These poor women look miserable. I'd love to just walk up and say...hey, look at these. They're gore-tex! An amazing invention! You can wear these! You can change into your fancy pants dress shoes when you get to work if you must! Go buy some! Then again, that's me. My blood teems with practicality and rugged mountain woman, even on days when I wear skirts and perfume. The end.

could it be?

2005-12-08T08:44:00.000-05:00

Am i becoming a morning person? All the signs are there. I'm awake and alert, and have been this way since 7am. I have precisely the right amount of coffee flowing through me, and I feel pleasant. I have morning person disease! ah! It wouldn't be so bad except for I will inevitable start next week by waking up at 8:30am, getting to work at 9:30am, and will be completely discombobulated. Sure, I could just continue this 6am waking up business...but it just doesn't seem natural for a creature such as myself. hrm.

Mid-morning ramblings:
1. Have you ever purchased a pair of shoes, let them sit in the closet for 6 months, then all of a sudden wear them once and henceforth wear them alll the time? I have such a pair and am wearing them right now. I age my shoes like wine.
2. I watched Revenge of the Sith last night. I like Star Wars. Watching it is always like a throwback to childhood for me. As much as I want to criticize the shortcomings of the movie, I can't do it. I still like the original trilogy the best though.
3. happy birthday to jake, happy birthday to jake...
4. back to work, happy thursday.

Addiction

2005-12-06T18:34:00.000-05:00

In my younger days (around 18-20ish), I determined I'm not so much of an addictive personality. I tried smoking, but it never really stuck. I drink beer, but I can start and stop and start again. Sometimes a month will go by without a beer and I'll finally stop to think, "hrm, I think i could go for a cold one." Same with caffeine. I drink coffee damn near daily, but if we run out of coffee, I just don't drink it. I don't twitch and moan and fall into deep withdrawal (though i will admit the occasional headache brought on by lack of coffee), I just continue on. So yes, non-addictive. Then the holidays hit...and I shop, and I shop, and then I shop some more. For about one month out of the year I am an insanely addicted holiday shopper. I'm online shopping, I'm window shopping, I'm visualizing what I need to buy and where I'll buy it. I had to step back today to realize the full spectrum of my syndrome. I had to fix myself a cup of apple spice tea and put away all my lists. I guess it just gets away from me...I want so much to get the perfect presents, and get everything everyone wants. I have to remind myself it's fun to give, and I shouldn't make myself crazy. I forget how wonderful all my gift recipients are, and that they'll like what I get...or in the least, just be happy they received something. So I'm trying to ween myself off of over shopping and over thinking my shopping. It's damn hard. But I'll start here. I'll start with my tea, and my blanket, and my candles glowing from their perch atop my plant stand. This weekend I'll most likely shop, but I'll take it easy, I'll buy less, I'll buy atleast one toy for a child I don't know (donate it), and I'll smile instead of think tensely about how many shopping days are left. I feel better already. Ah, the soothing powers of words on a webpage. Happy Stress-Free Shopping!!!!! :o)

finesse

2005-12-05T06:50:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was my first mountain bike excursion in the snow. It was cooooold! I looked quite hysterical with my black thermals, and baggy shorts on top, and non-matching socks hiked up as far as they would go. My legs were cold at the beginning of the ride, but the rest of me got toasty. 2 baselayers and a fleece took care of the top, and my new sixsixone gloves did their job.
I didn't realize 'til the end of the ride that I'd blown a seal on my fork. Jake was watching me ride and thought it just needed air (so did I), because i was compressing it the whole way everytime I went down hills, even smaller ones. But nope, a closer look, and a handful of goo (from the broken seal) proved us wrong. Should be fixed quick enough though. Back to the ride...I love riding in the snow. I found myself exhibiting some rare moments of finesse around bends, up hills, that I don't usually have. There's something about knowing you could slide out, knowing there are roots hidden under that snow...it makes you work harder. Things I can do easily without the snow, become a bit of a challenge.
When we set out for the ride, our landlords watched us load up the bikes and said, "wow, you guys are hardcore...it's so coolllld." heh. It wasn't really THAT cold though. About 30 degrees I guess. So I rode in the snow on 2 wheels, can't wait to get the 'ol plank out (aka snowboard).

my kinda fish

2005-12-02T12:19:00.000-05:00

Oh, MAN. So I found this while I was purusing the FSM products. I am amused.

some lyrics, just cuz

2005-11-30T15:29:00.000-05:00

This should be my anthem...

"My house is a small apartment, I pay my bills and I pay the rent
when the month is gone all my money's spent, so i can live in my small apartment."
- My Apartment, Addison Groove Project

Ya gotta imagine it sung with some seeerious FUNK! That's the only way it can really be my anthem :0P Someday maybe I'll be able to replace small apartment with "sweet log cabin".

In other random afternooner diversions, here's a must have for any flying spaghetti monster advocate: FSM* (ahem, Nancy!). Back to Work. I'm a machine today. Started at 7am and still going. The Energizer Bunny got nothin' on me!

*FSM = the humorous retort to the idiotic theory of intelligent design, read more here if you dare.

5, 6, 7 seasons ?

2005-11-30T12:03:00.000-05:00

I love the seasons. All of them. Even these wierd pseudo-hybrid half seasons that seem to keep happening before the real season starts. These times used to annoy me, now they're kinda fun. Just when i thought it was time to bust out the 'ol long johns and settle in for the winter, I'm planning my next bike ride. It's a nice surprise. Stratton and Mt. Snow are open, so i could even do both biking and snowboarding in one weekend if I wanted!!! Well, if I didn't have to save money for Christmas anyways. That's the beautiful thing about biking...it's expensive to start but once you have your rig built up, riding it is FREEEEE!

a thanksgiving story

2005-11-28T11:26:00.000-05:00

Twas the day of thanksgiving and all through the home
there was TV and X-box and beers topped with foam.
Gonzo, Sam Adams, drunk fast and with cheer,
and we munched tons of cookies while refilling our beer.
Then came the supper, enough for 20 or more...
We ate turkey and stuffing til we all yawned small roars.
Waddling from the table there was only one plan,
Naptime for us, as fast as we can!
Every couch and pillow, every space on the floor,
Were filled with full tummies and on occasion a snore.
And when napping was done, Sam Adams was there,
For a few feast topping beers and an end to the affair.
So that was Thanksgiving, great in every way.
I can't wait for Christmas, Have a Happy Monday!

The end.

hurts so good

2005-11-21T10:43:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was a bike ride day. It was destined to be a good day. Why? I hadn't ridden in over a month (due to Jake's weekend races and some weekends of rain and blah blah blah), and I had new bike shoes (sixsixone...they kick ass!), and new winter gloves (also sixsixone), AND a brand spankin' new Marzocchi fork (Jake got it for $80, it was originally about $250...ROCK!). It was like pre-Christmas. I haven't bought anything lately, so to get all this stuff at once was craziness. And it was all fairly cheap due to the magical bike shop discount.
So we went to Tyler Mill, and from beginning to end I felt more confident and more smooth and damn if I wasn't cranking up hills like a mofo. I even succeeded in climbing through a rock garden that I failed miserably at on my last ride. And logs...hoppin those were like butter. It's amazing what a comfy pair of shoes and an extra inch of travel will get ya. The extra inch makes my handle bars sit up higher and my overall bike fit seems to be just a little bit better.
So now I'm a little sore, but it's a good sore. The next trick will be to ride in the snow. I've never attempted 2 wheels in the snow, so that should be one hell of a ride. Turkey Day weekend!!!! woo!

Looks like I might be snowboarding AND bike riding this winter. kick ass.

alumni-itis

2005-11-19T11:04:00.000-05:00

Today, I had the strange urge to visit my old high school. I thought about high school for the first time in awhile and starting remembering all the people that taught me. Ya see, I wasn't so much a social animal in high school. I didn't like cliques. I liked learning and sports and non-snobby people. I was the un-assuming, good-grade getter, good tennis player that was conversational, but i never fell over myself to make friends. I had a nice little group of friends that I quite liked, and that was all i needed. I didn't mind high school, just never really looked back when i left it. I was happy for it to be over. Just now I was thinking how I won't go to any of my reunions. I don't have the desire. If people really want to find me, it's pretty easy. I'm google-able. But I would like to revisit the school. I'd like to visit some teachers and say, "hey, thanks for making me write those thesis papers, and correcting my horrific grammar, and for making me sit at my dining room table staring at derivatives and theorems and proofs. Thanks, cuz it helped me be a good student in college (minus all the beer), and it still helps me to be a good scientist." Yup, good 'ol OC may not have been my favorite time in life, but I came out of there with a pretty good head on my shoulders. hats off to the alma mater (oakland catholic). that's about as alumni like as you'll ever see me get.

time for saturday afternoon coffee, book reading, and attempting to novel write (emphasis on the "attempt")

the unfinished novel

2005-11-18T14:48:00.000-05:00

In a feeble atempt to breathe life into this half-written smattering of words I will refer to as a "novel", I'm posting an excerpt. It's a reminder to keep writing, no matter how much the story might suck, or how much this thing seems to be gnawing and clawing to get out of me rather than flowing smoothly as it had just 3 days into the process. So here we go. the unfinished novel: a part of a chapter about something or other:

Holland woke up and meandered his way into the kitchen. He reached for his canvas bag next the kitchen counter and pulled out a notebook. With what little light crept into the kitchen from the street lights outside, he started writing notes. He wrote questions he might ask and theories he might present. He leaned over and reached deeper into his bag pulling out a variety of plastic bags. Each bag held a rainbow of pharmaceuticals. He'd created a variety of cocktails based on his expertise in neurochemicals and behavior. He'd tried variations of the very same cocktails on his rotations at the hospital. Of all the new young residents, he seemed able to pinpoint individuals amazingly well. He prescribed drugs no one had thought to use, he mixed them with things like "a glass of orange juice" or "a handful of figs". He knew the properties of every drug, the benefits of every food, and the pathways each one took throughout the body to reach its destination. He was somewhat of a medicine man in that respect, and with soft steady hands, he was the surgeon everyone hoped would be standing over them if they were in need.
He fingered the multi-colored pills and held them to the light. He'd have to do better than this. He couldn't begin this journey by handing her a baggie of pills and a diatribe on how to use them. There would have to be talk. There would have to be reasoning. There would have to be meditation along with imitation. He'd have to be a doctor, a friend, a zen master, and a genius to get this done. To help cure the uncureable. To harness something no one before him could. He sighed and closed the notebook. Despite all his preparation and confidence, he'd have to rely on his instinct and just hope he didn't screw this up.

caffeine. caffeine. did i mention caffeine yet?

2005-11-16T15:06:00.000-05:00

I'm drinking a classic "get-me-through-the-rest-of-the-day" latte. I had to wake up early this morning, thus my sleep to hours needed to be awake ratio just isn't jivin' today. Caffeine was the only answer. In Pittsburgh we had a designated starbucks time. At 2:30pm, pretty much everyday, someone would knock at my door, poke their head in, smile, and go....starbucks????
There were about 3 of us really serious addicts that went almost everyday, and it never failed that on the days when one of the core 3 was actually thinking of skipping the 2:30 appointment, some other office mate came a-knockin. It was classic. I'm glad I'm not doing that anymore (cuz it got expensive), but I miss my 2:30pm caffeine posse. It was a good posse to have. So today, I'm my own posse of afternoon caffeine. so sad, but atleast the coffee tastes good :o)

In other caffeination news. We went to a place called "Sweet Relief" on Saturday. It's a healthy type place that serves wraps and teas. Jake and I rode our ghetto city cruising bikes there (I got to ride my really ugly, but FREE, 70's style orange bike), and had wraps and tea. Cinnamon Apple Spice tea. It was such a perfect mix of apple and cinnamon spice. yum. I like to divide my addiction amongst all forms of hot caffeinated beverage (and sometimes decaf! GASP! only
at night though).

Thus ends my ode to caffeine on a wednesday. cheers.

let it snow...please?!

2005-11-13T10:28:00.000-05:00

If I wasn't suffering from enough snowboarding anticipation, my friend in Breckenridge just called to gloat that not only is he on his way to Keystone to ride, but it's a POWDER DAY!! Breckenridge has 15 new inches of the white stuff. I am so terribly jealous. Ode to the Colorado Mountains! My poor snowboard is sitting in the closet just waiting to come out and play! Ah well, I have a novel to finish. We'll have snow soon enough. Stratton is due to open thanksgiving weekend. :o)

Back to my Sunday afternoon caffeination. It will take much of my freshly ground and brewed friend to induce novel writing. On a jolly note, the Steelers play tonight! TONIGHT, not this afternoon...meaning this currently new englanding pittsburgher gets to watch it!! high five!

AND...a GoNzo post

2005-11-10T20:12:00.000-05:00

The nice fellow at our local beer shop ordered Gonzo Imperial Porter. It's expensive (around $11 for four), but worth it. It's fantastic to have a neighborhood beer shop owner who wants to know what beers he can order us. This is a beautiful thing. The 7 bottles of Gonzo in my kitchen are an even more beautiful thing. Hunter S. Thompson would be so proud. To have Gonzo AND have all the latest and greatest winter seasonals hitting the taps/shops...ooooh! Last year I was addicted to Anderson Valley Winter Solstice. So far this year it's been dogfish head 'punkin ale. I think winter is my favorite beer season. 'Tis the season to get sloppy drinking good beer with relatives.

Also, beer provides good inspirato when your brain seems full of cobwebs. Maybe gonzo is the juice I need to get crackin' on my novel...right after the ice cream. Nothin like beer and ice cream on a thursday night!

say what?

2005-11-10T19:41:00.000-05:00

That's my response to being delerious on the couch sick on Tuesday, and then having to make it through three days of 8am-6:30pm training Wednesday-Friday. But I'm making it! One more day! The training is even enjoyable. They provide plenty of food and beverage to consume through the whole process of learning. mmm, yum! It's a course on fMRI analysis with SPM. Neuroscience stuff. fMRI = functional magnetic resonance imaging and SPM = statistical parametric mapping. Sometimes I think scientists create programs just to add to the ever growing arsenal of acronyms. Some days I find myself speaking more in acronyms than real words. Ah, the joys of being a science nerd. Tonight, I rest my brain with the help of my good friends Ben and Jerry. I have a big fat bowl of Dublin Mudslide with my name on it.

My Novel progress is negative right now. Tonight, perhaps my characters will wake back up after their lengthy nap.

munday

2005-11-07T13:36:00.000-05:00

So i have 7822 words now. I should be at around 11,000. oy. I have a lot of writing to do tonight. I was just too tired to plow through this weekend. We rode up to Putney, Vermont yesterday. Jake competed in his second cyclocross race this year. We stayed almost all day and watched all the other classes race. The race environment was awesome, it was on the grounds of a bike shop so they had tunes blaring throughout the race, and were selling food and apple cider ( I had two of those...YUM!) Jake finished right smack in the middle of his class. The setup of the course was pretty nice...they had one huuuge run-up, one little run-up, one set of hurdles, and then a lot of twisty turny parts on smooth dirt. They had one jump that most people just rode up and over, but a couple of people got some air coming off. I was taking some pictures when one cyclist decided to huck it and he crashed right in front of me...right into one of the course barriers. OUCH!! He was okay though, right back on the bike. A few teenage kids were mooning their friends as they rode by. heh. Gotta love bike racing. If I ever raced, I think I'd try cross before mountain bike racing. Cross has this nice mix of bike and running (that's why they have the hurdles and the hills to run up, so you have to get off the bike, apparently a lot of road bikers race cyclocross cuz it's good training in the winter). I don't think I'm a racing kind of gal though. I like to spectate. I'm a Class A spectator. Class A is the highest. We watched the class A mens race. Their first lap was completely insane. They did the course in about half the time, and watching them hurdle was almost unbelievable. They lept like deer. My bottom lip almost hit the ground. eesh. So now it's monday, and it's still warm out. wooo! I'm still excited for snow though. Apparently Killington was open for a few days already. They're closed again, but had 3ft at the top. This is why i would love to live in Oregon. Mt. Hood is open through July. You could be mountain biking one day, then take your snowboard up to Hood the next. THAT ROCKS!!!!! On that thought, i best stop daydreaming and do some work.

Evolution: a thought

2005-11-05T14:43:00.000-05:00

Conservative Christians and Intelligent Design. Don't these people have anything better to do with their time than attack a fundamental theory and prevent their children from learning one of the most engaging keystones of scientific discovery?? Why is it that people are repelled by things they do not understand? An academic war over teaching evolution??? If I were a parent right now, I think I'd seriously investigate the option of home schooling.

from CNN.com:

"Now, the new Kansas standards, which outline what teachers should teach and test on, leave evolutionary principles in the curriculum but insert phrasing that encourages students to question their validity. The standards also delete certain text about how science is defined.
"The stakes are high," said Eugenie Scott, executive director of the National Center for Science Education. "If Kansas gets away with it ... I anticipate that in every state where science standards are up for revision, we are going to be fighting another battle."
Efforts to undermine evolution instruction have also been seen in Michigan, Kentucky, Georgia and elsewhere. And one key case was being tested in court this week in Pennsylvania, where a group of parents sued the Dover Area School Board because teachers had been ordered to tell biology students that the theory of evolution is not established fact."

[kudos to Pennsylvania parents for showing some gumption and resisting this rediculous BS.
It's ashame you have to sue to have your voice heard these days. Though evolution is called a theory in the sense that we do not know exactly how it occurs, there is undeniable proof that organisms evolve. This is most certainly established fact. Urgh, anti-scientist crap makes me irritable. Science is fun! Parents are going to ruin it for their children. What a shame.]

word count ahoy

2005-11-04T13:45:00.000-05:00

I just hit 6000 words. I feel like that episode of friends, where phoebe and rachel start running together. Phoebe does this crazy flailing her arms around running, cuz she says that's the only way it's fun. It's like how little kids run around when they play. I feel like i'm running around flailing my arms like that, only on paper. It's free and un-restrictive and a very good feeling. I don't think i've ever willingly written this much in four days. I don't know if i can keep it up. I don't care though. Seems okay so far. It's like therapy.

Ribbit

2005-11-04T10:25:00.000-05:00

Toad's Place. Medeski, Martin, and Wood. Last night. WoW! Toad's is quickly becoming my very favorite small venue. No matter when we get in line, we always seem to get there at a good time, and we always have a good spot with a view of the band. It's got this great small club feel, with the possibility of anyone playing there...no matter how small or big. The Stones opened their '89 tour at Toad's! If you scan the posters hanging across the ceiling you'll see everything from the Talking Heads to Dizzy Gilespie to Count Basie to Slayer! Phish played a few shows there in 1990. So far we've seen The Reverend Horton Heat, Les Claypool, and MMW. We may check out Galactic next week. This depends on funds and the level of tiredness at concert time. Apparently Toad's started out as a French Restaurant that served frog legs, and as the restaurant business dwindled live entertainment was brought in...and it grew and grew and grew. And now Toad's is know by promoters everywhere as a fantastic place to do business with...bands actually contact them to play there!!
In addition to my post MMW joyful stupor, it's absolutely beautiful out today. The suns shining, the trees are bright yellow-orange-red. AND, I might have a new bike tonight. Nothing exciting. Jake scored a couple old beaters for us to cruise around town on. Apparently mines a reaaaallly ugly orange. WOO-HOO. If any ugly color suits me, it's ugly orange. I can't wait.

it's ALIVE!!

2005-11-02T16:01:00.000-05:00

My NaNoWriMo Home. This little webpage is keeping me on my game. You have the option to upload words whenever you like, and as often as you like. Some might wait until the very end, and just keep track on their own until that time. Not I. The minute I've made some progress, I upload it. It keeps me motivated to see that word count steadily increase toward the coveted 50,000. I'm at around 3600 now. So i'm working at a good daily pace. I hope this keeps up! I'm trying not to force it, which is hard when you know you absolutely must get a certain amount done each day, or face playing catch-up. I can't tell how it reads yet, it's all just a blur of story and character. It's a fun ride so far. Though it's only Day 2, 28 more to go!! Today I posted my first excerpt. Whether I continue posting excerpts daily depends on how cohesively I manage to keep this tail I'm weaving (on my massive literary loom). So far, I think it's atleast okay. That's Something.

egads, a novel hatches

2005-11-01T18:56:00.000-05:00

I have 1700 words of a novel, and damn is this stuff hard. I have an issue with trying to get everything out at once. It's like a race to extract the story from my head... every detail, every aspect of a scenario. This makes for a horrific time trying to fashion a piece of coherent writing 50,000 words long. wow. hard. But I'm gonna have some tea, and plow through the jumble of words I wrote today. Maybe they'll even make sense. Maybe I have a story on my hands. Maybe it will even evolve over this next month. hrm. I wonder.

NaNoWriMo

2005-10-31T18:15:00.000-05:00

Less than 6 hours until i begin something either rediculously stupid, or amazingly fulfilling. I'm thinking it will be a little bit of both. Ya see, NaNoWriMo stands for "National Novel Writing Month". Right now, many thousands around the world are preparing to spend the entire month of November creating 50,000 words worth of brain children....and i'm one of those nutballs. I'm both excited and fearful. We'll see how it goes. oy vey...

Also...
this poem has nothing to do with NaNoWriMo, but i found it in my folder 'o stuff...and i need to get into a writing mood. Time to tap into what well of creative energy I have in me. So, here's a poem...cuz for a whole month I'll be writing nothing but prose.

The life of a poet.
Creeping in silent fashion through
Paraphrase and parable,
A master of rhyme and meter;
A master, yet unholy in a quest to spill
A lifetime of brain jelly onto paper,
Capsized thoughts ambitiously defined,
Whimsical has a life of it’s own coupled
With the correct adverb…
Sigh, and surrender to the fashion that is ceremonious
Art.
Urge and passion swept into a net of exotically woven verse.
Madness seems better. Discomfort more real.
Truth, most sincere.
Poets are the wind silently humming in the trees,
An artifact of nature.

Un-Halloweened

2005-10-31T10:28:00.000-05:00

Well, this weekend was less than exciting. It was less than average. It was un-Shannan like. And that's coming from a general optimist. I've discovered Halloween just isn't as fun when you don't have your friends around. These are the people that appreciate how much you worked on your costume, and how it fits your personality, and how humorous (while gross) it really is. The scenario was something like this: Shannan walks into party and is greeted by store-bought female pirate, store-bought rainbow brite, store-bought playboy bunny, and various other clean, no-muss, no-fuss costumes. Not one zombie, or one person with corpse-like features and face make-up. My torn-off wings with blood on them were the closest thing to "scary" anywhere near the party. Someone asked if I was a "sadistic angel". Some were just like "oh, I get what you are". The party was nice enough i guess, and the people were nice enough...i just felt like a lonely little fallen angel on the island of misfit halloween costumes. One nice fellow came up and told me the wings were awesome and was really psyched about it...and i appreciated that sooo much. I musta had a huuuge smile. He was a scarecrow...a homemade scarecrow with white face make-up. His costume was the best. The guy that dressed up as obi-wan was pretty good too. He fashioned it out of a bath towel and big fisherman type brown boots. It looked like the real deal. Way better than store-bought chewbacca and store-bought beer bottle, and store-bought beer keg....do you see a theme here???? I just don't see the fun of going to the store and picking something to be. It would be okay, if supported with some other props and face make-up. Maybe I should just shut-up and stop being a Halloween grinch. I had such high hopes for this Halloween though, and it ended up feeling like I was at a really preppy frat party with no-one I knew and a drunk boyfriend. what fun.

a good distraction

2005-10-27T08:27:00.000-04:00

CAT BOWLING ...I scored 100 on my first try. I vow to not play it again until lunchtime (i'll just blog instead....MUHAHAHAHAHA). So tomorrow starts the weekend of debauchery. I'm in a haze, not really believing we'll be traveling and embarking on a full weekend of socialization and merriment (or rather, scariment). What happened to those days of depressive lonliness? I had a few weeks of blahs... feeling lonely and hermit-like, but since that time it's been a whirlwind of interactions and events. It's amazing what happens when you stay busy. Plus, I'm a comfort creature...I like familiar faces and gatherings on the horizon...and there are so many in the next few months! Not to mention, snow. Snow, snow, SNOW! I'll severely miss Seven Springs this year. Having the option to ride every weekend was my crack. Something I'd been wanting to do for so long suddenly became an every weekend occurence. It was like a long winter dream. I'll find a way to relive the dream this year. Stratton, Mt. Snow...nice to meet ya.

afterthought

2005-10-26T11:15:00.000-04:00

Somedays, statements like that make me feel guilty. Not guilty for my life or what's in it, but guilty for forgetting these things. Forgetting for even a minute, the existence of impoverished people. And forgetting for even a second, how nice a life i really have here. Life itself, the quality we maintain....well, there has to be a yin to the yang of poverty. I can't feel bad about having clean water, sanitation, and nice things, because that's what we hope for and try to deliver to the third world. There has to be a silver lining. That's how i like to think of myself, and of all of us...part of the silver lining. It's a comforting thought. I like to live simply and be happy and enjoy what (and who) is around me.

a humbling statement

2005-10-26T09:43:00.000-04:00

And I’m afraid a rock concert every 20 years isn’t enough. Perhaps what we need instead are a thousand “town criers” like Bob Barker, the venerable game show host who closes every Price is Right with an admonition to “spay or neuter your pet. "If we ended every TV broadcast, from Good Morning America to Six Feet Under, with "every day 35 million children die of extreme poverty" or “the average per capita yearly income in Sri Lanka is $880,” or “the infant mortality rate per 1,000 live births in Angola is 187,” this apathetic (and often selfish) country might finally come to realize how the other half lives.

from emagazines "Poverty is terrorism"

random food-ology

2005-10-25T14:25:00.000-04:00

I have a love affair with olives. Lately, I want them all the time. I don't usually have them at home, but any sandwich I get at work must have olives. black olives to be precise. It's not so much the taste. Well, a little the taste...but even moreso I like the color and texture it adds to a sandwich. As a bonus, I found out that olives are a good source of monounsaturated fats (can help lower the risk of cellular damage and inflammation) and vitamin E (antioxidant)...so this makes me love olives even more.

In other randomness, I started growing my own garlic. It wasn't intentional. I had a lonely forgotten bulb in my refrigerator, and one day I noticed it was not only there, but it was sprouting. Then i read a little and discovered that fall is a great time to plant garlic...so i took that little clove sprout and made it a home in my window. Now I have a green shoot about 8 inches tall. I'll have fresh garlic! (eventually) I'm not really a green thumb, so when a chance plant event occurs...I figure I best make the most of it and propigate away.

Thus ends my ode to olives and garlic. Happy N'oreaster Tuesday.

this Is Halloween

2005-10-24T15:50:00.000-04:00

Less than one week before i get to dress up, spend an entire weekend looking un-myself, and acting intoxicated and impish. what a grand holiday. I used to not like Halloween so much. I'm Halloween bi-polar. I like it when things fall into place. When I'm not sure what's going on and not sure about a costume, I just get annoyed. Last year I went out but didn't dress up...not this year though. I had a Halloween rebirth the other night at the party store. All of my costume woes melted as I looked at all the little do-dads and trinkets and fun props. oooh, fun stuff. I'm gonna be a fallen angel. No, not a short skirt, black winged, low cut top, fallen tramp...but a fallen angel. I happened upon this long shear getup at the thrift store and i'm gonna cut a couple holes in the back, paste tufts of white feathers around the edges, and dribble fake blood to make it look like my poor wings were torn off as i was tossed outta heaven. I'll make flowy arm thingies and wear all black underneath...plus wear a store bought black halo and black necklace with a little white jewel on it. I think i spent about $10 total on the ensemble. that's the fun of Halloween. I hope it turns out as good as it sounds. I have visions of myself sitting on the floor sometime this week with feathers glued to myself and shear material all torn up and un-wearable. I already put a runner in the black tights i bought. But i figure the tights should be torn up anyway. Can't fall that far without looking disheveled. So that's my project for the week. Finish the costume. oooh, ahhh!
Happy week before Halloween.

head full of stuff

2005-10-21T09:51:00.000-04:00

stuff-i-ness. yup. I'm Sick. Know what's worse than being sick? Being sick on a friday. I've been trying to trick the sickness for almost three days now. On Wednesday I got home and felt crazy not wanting to move tired. I almost became a couch ornament, but fought the urge...took a shower, went to the bike shop to play, and ate pizza. At the shop I rode a tandem with Jake (a freakin tandem mountain bike, it was funny and damn fun too), then I rode a Kona Coiler. OOOOOOhhhhh, I've never riddin full suspension before. That sucker took sidewalks like nothing! I was flying around the bike shop parking lot, up and down on curbs, yippin and "woo-hoo"-ing. It felt so good. Rode a Kona Stinky too...too downhill for my tastes. I then got my camera out and started taking a bazillion bike pictures, just for kicks cuz bike porn is entertaining. I took close-ups, and far-aways, and bright-lights, and dim-lights, and bikes on ceilings, and bike parts, and whole bikes, and accessories, and....on and on. I'm very easily entertained. So then yesterday the sickness grew. I now had the every 2 second sniffle accompanied by the drugged up stupor. So what'd I do last night? Made a lemon loaf. Yup, I made a freakin lemon loaf. Call me crazy, but i don't like being sick...so I'll psyche myself out of it for as long as I can. Though, the end result of not giving into the sickness is ending up extra tired. I woke up at 7am and couldn't crawl out of bed until 9am. But I'm at work. Tonight I'll relax. Promise. Movies and take-out. thas right.

delayed reaction

2005-10-20T09:09:00.000-04:00

Mountaineer Inn, Vermont. This is where we went a few weeks ago. It's situated at the base of Mount Snow. I'm in the mood to think about vacationing and bike riding and crisp but not freezing weather. So there ya go...
(that's the good 'ol jeep, and the bikes, and the Jake in front of the Inn)

more les

2005-10-18T16:04:00.000-04:00

I nearly forgot. Gabby La La played sitar last night with Les. She had this crazy electric green wig on. Awesomeness all around. There was a xylophone player too.

locals and Les

2005-10-18T13:16:00.000-04:00

Les Claypool. An ingenius crazy-man. I've seen Primus live. I've seen Oysterhead live. Last night I stood 6 rows back staring into the sunglassed eyeballs of Les Claypool. Plastic cup of Guiness in hand, eyes glazed, and feet a tap-tap-tappin to every bass lines spastically smooth birth from the hands of Claypool. Not only that, but I had a posse of locals. For the first time since moving, I had a group. Jake invited these 3 guys over to the apartment before the show. We slugged down about 3 beers each, bullshat, and made our way to the final destination... Toad's Place. Toad's Place is New Haven's music mecca (good music mecca anyway). It's the kind of place with no seating, several bars, and a large coziness about it. It's the kind of place you here once-in-a-lifetime stories about...secret shows, special guests. It's had a history of legendary live performance. And we live within walking distance. So we walked. The full moon lighting our way. My 3 beer jacket kept me warm and cozy, and if that hadn't done it, the excitement would have made up the difference. To be walking down the street under a full moon, with a group of people, on the way to see Les Claypool live at Toad's Place. Yup, that's about as good as it gets on a Monday night. I had a few minutes where i wanted to kick myself for not bringing a camera. We had the kind of magical view where any snapshot would have been amazing. No enhancing, no digital resizing. I could have captured a moment and hung it in my living room. Damn, it would have been Picasso on film. Then Jake said the best thing in response to my mutterings about wishing I had a camera. He said something along the lines of "well, that makes this moment just for us". I don't think he even realized just how sweet and sentimental it sounded. What a great reason not to have a camera. Though i wished I had pictures to show, we had a moment. A moment we can share in words, and smile to ourselves as it plays out in our heads. It's a warm cuddly thought. And it happened at a Les Claypool show. ah, life is sweet.

uh huh

2005-10-17T11:13:00.000-04:00

Listening to blackbird (Crosby, Stills, and Nash). I love when iTunes pleasantly surprises me. This most happens with favorite phish songs, or a good tea leaf green or acoustic syndicate extended jam, or a horn heavy jazz tune. When you're in a particular mood, and just such a song plays to compliment that mood...then all is right with the world.

full moon, full of rooftop expectation

2005-10-17T10:40:00.000-04:00

Full Moon Tonight. After 1 full week of rain. After 7 complete days of soaked self and sodden clothes...our reward is a clear sky and a full moon. I'll take it. This is the type of night I wish I had my deck at home, but then again I have my city porch (fire escape) and my penthouse balcony (roof). Last time we spent time on the roof was the fourth of July. We were on our way home from somewhere...maybe a bike ride, maybe Pittsburgh. I'm really not sure. I know we had bikes on the roof. Connecticut is so flat that we saw about a dozen simultaneous sets of fireworks as we drove. I kept craning my neck every way I could to catch a glimpse of fire in the sky. Jake laughed. I laughed, and kept craning my neck every which way. As we pulled onto our street we had to dodge kids igniting mini explosions in the middle of the street. We jumped out of the car, grabbed 2 sierra nevadas, and went to the roof. We got there just in time to see the finale erupt in the sky above New Haven Harbor. Despite the lights, the sirens, the chill in the air, and the light drizzle...it was a great few moments. Cuddled next to each other speculating about where we'd be next year. On the same roof? In the suburbs? In a different state? The rain was so light and subtle, you could barely see it, only feel it gently touch our skin. Jake noticed that part about it. He noticed the rain was so nearly invisible and silent, had we been inside we wouldn't have even known it rained. We would have missed that whole part of the night. That part of nature. mmm. it was good. So a full moon? A clear sky? I think that calls for a six pack and a roof. The roof is like my holiday from the city.

If I were a movie...

2005-10-14T11:40:00.000-04:00

I'd sound something like this:

The tale of a young researcher attempting to find her way in a town entrenched in academia. As she struggles to pay her bills and find some way to afford one day entering graduate school, she comes to the realization that nothing worth having is easy. Follow her on a journey through mountain towns and big cities where a strong beer and a good cup of coffee are the answers to every problem. A story of aimless thought, frenzied melody, books, simplicity, and sustenance...where a bike is more that 2 wheels and the trail never ends.

(movie descriptions have to be a little cheesy and somewhat obscurely generalized, i'd be genreless, i could never be an action or drama...and it would be tiring to always be a comedy)

Nikos Logothetis

2005-10-13T15:48:00.000-04:00

Doing a typical afternoon perusal of Nature, I came across this man Nikos. This is the type of neuroscientist I would like to be. Here's one quote I'd love to shout from the rooftops for every over-analyzing, non-hypothesizing, grasping at straws neuroscientist to hear...and another that depicts what every neuroscientist shoud aspire to achieve (in my world anyways):

The brain is a very accommodating structure,” he warns. “It will let you generate a mass of data and interpret them to support your idea.” The key, he says, is strict quality of methodology and keeping the ears resolutely plugged against the siren song of over-interpretation.

Unlike many lab chiefs, Logothetis says he will continue to deploy the hands-on skills that made his name. “I prefer to work more like a postdoc than a research director,” he says. “I like to do experiments myself.” Typically, he runs experiments in the mornings and crunches data until the small hours.